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What is Asexuality? And How to Find Support. 

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Asexuality is a sexual orientation that is often misunderstood or overlooked in mainstream discussions about sexuality. Yet, for individuals who identify as asexual, it is a fundamental aspect of their identity and lived experience. In this article, we'll explore what it means to be asexual, debunk common misconceptions, and discuss the importance of seeking support through therapy.

Defining Asexuality

Asexuality is a sexual orientation characterized by a lack of sexual attraction or interest in sexual activity. Asexual individuals may still experience romantic attraction and desire emotional intimacy, but they do not experience sexual attraction in the same way that others do. Asexuality exists on a spectrum, with variations in romantic orientation, libido, and attitudes toward sexual behavior. Allosexual, on the other hand, means that you do experience sexual attraction to others, regardless of who you are attracted to or what type of sex you desire. 

Debunking Misconceptions

  • Not a Phase: Asexuality is not a phase or a temporary state of being. It is a valid and enduring aspect of a person's identity, just like any other sexual orientation.


  • Not Dysfunction: Asexuality is not a dysfunction or disorder. It is simply a variation in human sexuality, and asexual individuals are perfectly capable of leading fulfilling and meaningful lives.


  • Not Celibacy: Asexuality is not the same as celibacy. Celibacy is a choice to abstain from sexual activity, whereas asexuality is a lack of sexual attraction regardless of behavior or choices.

The Road to Acceptance and Empowerment

For many asexual individuals, understanding and accepting their identity can be a journey of self-discovery, self-acceptance, and ultimately empowerment and self-love. It may involve questioning societal norms and expectations surrounding sexuality, exploring one's own feelings and experiences, and seeking validation and affirmation from supportive communities and resources. This all takes time and requires support. If you find yourself exploring an asexual identity, make sure not to do it alone.


Asexuality is a sexual orientation that is often misunderstood or overlooked in mainstream discussions about sexuality. Yet, for individuals who identify as asexual, it is a fundamental aspect of their identity and lived experience. In this article, we'll explore what it means to be asexual, debunk common misconceptions, and discuss the importance of seeking support through therapy.

Defining Asexuality

Asexuality is a sexual orientation characterized by a lack of sexual attraction or interest in sexual activity. Asexual individuals may still experience romantic attraction and desire emotional intimacy, but they do not experience sexual attraction in the same way that others do. Asexuality exists on a spectrum, with variations in romantic orientation, libido, and attitudes toward sexual behavior. Allosexual, on the other hand, means that you do experience sexual attraction to others, regardless of who you are attracted to or what type of sex you desire. 

Debunking Misconceptions

  • Not a Phase: Asexuality is not a phase or a temporary state of being. It is a valid and enduring aspect of a person's identity, just like any other sexual orientation.


  • Not Dysfunction: Asexuality is not a dysfunction or disorder. It is simply a variation in human sexuality, and asexual individuals are perfectly capable of leading fulfilling and meaningful lives.


  • Not Celibacy: Asexuality is not the same as celibacy. Celibacy is a choice to abstain from sexual activity, whereas asexuality is a lack of sexual attraction regardless of behavior or choices.

The Road to Acceptance and Empowerment

For many asexual individuals, understanding and accepting their identity can be a journey of self-discovery, self-acceptance, and ultimately empowerment and self-love. It may involve questioning societal norms and expectations surrounding sexuality, exploring one's own feelings and experiences, and seeking validation and affirmation from supportive communities and resources. This all takes time and requires support. If you find yourself exploring an asexual identity, make sure not to do it alone.


Asexuality is a sexual orientation that is often misunderstood or overlooked in mainstream discussions about sexuality. Yet, for individuals who identify as asexual, it is a fundamental aspect of their identity and lived experience. In this article, we'll explore what it means to be asexual, debunk common misconceptions, and discuss the importance of seeking support through therapy.

Defining Asexuality

Asexuality is a sexual orientation characterized by a lack of sexual attraction or interest in sexual activity. Asexual individuals may still experience romantic attraction and desire emotional intimacy, but they do not experience sexual attraction in the same way that others do. Asexuality exists on a spectrum, with variations in romantic orientation, libido, and attitudes toward sexual behavior. Allosexual, on the other hand, means that you do experience sexual attraction to others, regardless of who you are attracted to or what type of sex you desire. 

Debunking Misconceptions

  • Not a Phase: Asexuality is not a phase or a temporary state of being. It is a valid and enduring aspect of a person's identity, just like any other sexual orientation.


  • Not Dysfunction: Asexuality is not a dysfunction or disorder. It is simply a variation in human sexuality, and asexual individuals are perfectly capable of leading fulfilling and meaningful lives.


  • Not Celibacy: Asexuality is not the same as celibacy. Celibacy is a choice to abstain from sexual activity, whereas asexuality is a lack of sexual attraction regardless of behavior or choices.

The Road to Acceptance and Empowerment

For many asexual individuals, understanding and accepting their identity can be a journey of self-discovery, self-acceptance, and ultimately empowerment and self-love. It may involve questioning societal norms and expectations surrounding sexuality, exploring one's own feelings and experiences, and seeking validation and affirmation from supportive communities and resources. This all takes time and requires support. If you find yourself exploring an asexual identity, make sure not to do it alone.


Seeking Support Through Therapy

Therapy can be a valuable resource for individuals who are exploring their asexual identity or seeking support in navigating the challenges and complexities that may arise. A therapist who specializes in LGBTQIA issues can provide a safe and affirming space for asexual individuals to explore their thoughts, feelings, and experiences, and to develop coping strategies, resilience, and self-acceptance.

Finding an LGBTQIA affirming therapist can be easy or challenging depending on where you live. The good news is that most therapists operate at least partially online these days, so if there is a city in your state with an LGBTQIA presence, there are likely some affirming therapist options, so try searching there. Often therapists will provide a free 15 minute consultation where you can gauge their comfort level with asexuality. 

Through therapy, asexual individuals can:

  • Explore Identity: Affirming therapy offers a space for individuals to explore their asexual identity, understand their feelings and experiences, and develop a deeper sense of self-awareness and self-acceptance. With the right therapist, exploring identity can actually be a fun activity. 


  • Address Challenges: Asexual individuals may face challenges related to identity acceptance, navigating relationships, or managing societal expectations. Therapy provides support and guidance in addressing these challenges with resilience and empowerment.


  • Find Validation: In therapy, individuals can find validation, affirmation, and support for their asexual identity, helping them feel seen, heard, and understood in a world that may not always recognize or affirm their experiences.


  • Develop Coping Skills: Therapy equips individuals with coping skills, mindfulness techniques, and self-care strategies to manage stress, anxiety, or other emotional challenges that may arise in relation to their asexuality.


Being asexual is a valid and legitimate aspect of human diversity that deserves to be recognized, respected, and affirmed. If you identify as asexual or are questioning your sexual orientation, know that you are not alone, and that support is available. Consider reaching out to a therapist who specializes in LGBTQIA issues to explore your feelings, gain insight and validation, and embark on a journey of self-discovery, acceptance, and empowerment. Your identity is valid, and your voice deserves to be heard.

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