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5 Ways to Prepare for the Holidays if You're Queer
Nick Fager, Expansive Cofounder



1. Come up with ways to queer your holidays
Bring your creative queer energy into stale traditions. What is something new and queer that you can start for yourself this year? What does it look like for you to transcend binaries and expand beyond categories when it comes to the holidays?
2. Take some time to check in with yourself pre-holidays
Notice what your authentic hopes and fears about the holidays without judgement. Ask yourself, what are you needing in order to feel okay this holiday season? What would make you happy? What are you willing to endure for the sake of family? Which parts of you are needing a little extra care this time of year, and how can you show up for them?

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3. Lay down boundaries
if you're going into a heteronormative environment for the holidays, think about what physical and emotional boundaries you need to put in place that will allow you to feel safe enough to show up with an open heart? Staying in a hotel? Steering clear of politics? Try to communicate your boundaries in a loving way, and remove yourself if they're not respected.
4. Take your queer community with you
Wherever you're going for the holidays, stay connected to your chosen family. Text right before you enter a cis-het holiday situation, tell close friends you might need to call them. Create a game plan with your partner(s) on how to manage stressful situations. Revive the queer group chat to vent or laugh together.
5. Protect against loneliness
If you don't have any plans, do yourself a favor and make at least one nice plan for yourself, however small. Don't feel pressure to make those plans align with some mainstream idea of what the holidays should be. Make a sex date, or have a drink with a friend. Strengthen your chosen family bonds, or simply have some fun.
Read our blog post on Navigating Holiday Stress to learn more tips.
3. Lay down boundaries
if you're going into a heteronormative environment for the holidays, think about what physical and emotional boundaries you need to put in place that will allow you to feel safe enough to show up with an open heart? Staying in a hotel? Steering clear of politics? Try to communicate your boundaries in a loving way, and remove yourself if they're not respected.
4. Take your queer community with you
Wherever you're going for the holidays, stay connected to your chosen family. Text right before you enter a cis-het holiday situation, tell close friends you might need to call them. Create a game plan with your partner(s) on how to manage stressful situations. Revive the queer group chat to vent or laugh together.
5. Protect against loneliness
If you don't have any plans, do yourself a favor and make at least one nice plan for yourself, however small. Don't feel pressure to make those plans align with some mainstream idea of what the holidays should be. Make a sex date, or have a drink with a friend. Strengthen your chosen family bonds, or simply have some fun.
Read our blog post on Navigating Holiday Stress to learn more tips.

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Join our mailing list

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